Category Archives: self-care skills

For Kids With Hypermobility, “Listen To Your Body” Doesn’t Teach Them To Pace Themselves. Here’s What Really Helps.

 

chen-hu-664399-unsplashI ran across a comment piece online that recommended parents teach their hypermobile  children to “listen to your body” to pace activities in an effort to avoid fatigue, pain or injury.  My reaction was fairly strong and immediate.  The sensory-based effects of hypermobility (HM) reduce interoception (internal body awareness)  and proprioception/kinesthesia (position and movement sense, respectively).  These are the  main methods of “listening” we use to know how we are feeling and moving.  For children with HM, telling them to listen to their body’s messages is like telling them to put on their heavy boots and then go see how cold the snow is outside! 

Relying primarily on felt senses when you have difficulty receiving adequate sensory feedback doesn’t make…..sense.  What often happens is that kids find themselves quickly out of energy, suddenly sore or tripping/falling due to fatigue, and they had very little indication of this approaching until they “hit a wall”.  They might not even see it as a problem.  Some kids are draped over the computer or stumbling around but tell you that they feel just fine.  And they aren’t lying. This is the nature of the beast.

I am all for therapy that helps kids develop greater sensory processing (as an OTR, I would have to be!), but expecting HM kids to intuitively develop finely tuned body awareness? That is simply unfair. Kids blame themselves all too easily when they struggle.  What begins as a well-meaning suggestion from a person with typical sensory processing can turn into just another frustrating experience for a child with HM.

What could really help kids learn to pace themselves to prevent extreme fatigue, an increase in pain and even injury due to overdoing things?

  1. Age-appropriate education regarding the effects of HM.  Very young children need to follow an adult’s instructions (“time to rest, darling!”), but giving older kids and teens a medical explanation of how HM contributes to fatigue, pain, injuries, etc. teaches them to think.   Understanding the common causes of their issues makes things less scary and empowers them.  If you aren’t sure how to explain why your child could have difficulty perceiving how hard they are working or whether they are sitting in an ergonomic position, read Hypermobility and Proprioception: Why Loose Joints Create Sensory Processing Problems for Children for some useful information.  You could ask your child’s OT or PT for help.  They should be able to give you specific examples of how your child responds to challenges and even a simple script to use in a discussion.  Explaining the “why” will help children understand how to anticipate and prepare for the effects of HM.
  2. Consider finding a pediatric occupational therapist to teach your child postural, movement and interoceptive awareness, adapt your child’s learning and living environments for maximal ease and endurance, and teach your child joint protection techniques.  Occupational therapists are often thought of as the people that hand out finger splints and pencil grips.  We are so much more useful to your child than that narrow view!  For example, I have adapted desks for optimal postural endurance and decreased muscle tension.  This has immediate effects on a child’s use of compensations like leaning their chin on their hand to look at a screen.  OT isn’t just for babies or handwriting!
  3. Pacing starts with identifying priorities.  If you don’t have boundless energy, attention, strength and endurance, then you have to choose where to spend your physical “currency”.  Help your child identify what is most important to them in their day, their week, and so on.  Think about what gives them satisfaction and what they both love to do and need to do.  This type of analysis is not easy for most kids.  Even college students struggle to prioritize and plan their days and weeks.  Take it slow, but make it clear that their goals are your goals.  For many children with HM, being able to set goals and identify priorities means that they will need to bank some of their energy in a day or a week so that they are in better shape for important events.  They may divide up tasks into short components, adapt activities for ease, or toss out low-level goals in favor of really meaningful experiences.  Can this be difficult or even disappointing?  Almost certainly!  The alternative is to be stuck at an event in pain, become exhausted before a job is completed, or end up doing something that places them at higher risk for injury.
  4. Help your child identify and practice using their best strategies for generating energy, building stamina and achieving pain-free movement.  Some kids with HM need to get more rest than their peers.  Others need to be mindful of diet, use relaxation techniques, wear orthotics regularly, adapt their home or school environment, or engage in a home exercise program.  Learning stress-reduction techniques can be very empowering and helps kids think through situations calmly.    Creating a plan together and discussing the wins and failures models behaviors like optimism and resourcefulness.  Children depend on adults to show them that self-pacing is a process, not an endpoint.

Looking for more information to help your child with hypermobility?  Take look at The Hypermobile Hand: More Than A Strength ProblemShould Your Hypermobile Child Play Sports? and How Hypermobility Affects Self-Image, Behavior and Activity Levels in Children.  My e-books on pediatric hypermobility are coming out soon!  Check back here at BabyBytes for updates.

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Boost Pincer Grasp With Tiny Containers

These days I am getting pretty…lazy.  My go-to items are designed so that children automatically  improve their grasp or their posture without my intervention.  I am  always searching for easy carryover strategies to share with parents too.  As with most things in life, easy is almost always better than complicated.

My recent fave piece of equipment to develop pincer grasp in toddlers and preschoolers is something you can pick up in your grocery store, but you are gonna use it quite differently from the manufacturer’s marketing plan….

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Remember these?

Enter the tiny party cup, AKA the disposable shot glass!  Yes, the one you used when you played “quarters” in school.  The very same.  These little cups work really well to teach toddlers to drink from an open cup, but they are also terrific containers to promote pincer grasp in young children.  Drop a few small snacks into these little cups and discourage them from dumping their snack onto the table instead of reaching inside with their fingers.

No matter how small your child’s fingers are, they will automatically attempt a tripod or pincer grasp to retrieve their treat.  You should’t have to say much of anything, but it never hurts to demonstrate how easy it is.  Make sure you eat your snack once you take it out of your cup.  After all, grownups deserve snacks too!

These little containers are much sturdier than paper cups.  This means that they can survive the grasp of a toddler who cannot grade their force well.  The cylindrical shape, with a slightly smaller base than top, naturally demands a refined grasp.  The cups have a bit of texture around the middle of the cup (at least mine do)  which gives some helpful tactile input to assist the non-dominant hand to maintain control during use.  They are top-shelf dishwasher safe and hand-washable, in case you feel strongly that disposables aren’t part of your scene.

Has your child mastered pincer grasp?  These little cups are fun to use in water and sand tables as well.  Mastery of pouring and scooping develops strong wrist and forearm control for utensil use and pre-writing with crayons.

For more ideas on developing grasp, take a look at Want Pincer Grasp Before Her First Birthday? Bet You’ll Be Surprised At What Moves (Hint) Build Hand Control! and Develop Pincer Grasp With Ziploc Bags.

 

Improving Daily Life Skills for Kids With Special Needs

 

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Therapro, the terrific source for a lot of handy therapy equipment and especially for items that help kids with sensory processing issues, has posted another piece from me on ADLs.  Take a look: What Helps Special Needs Kids Tolerate Grooming and Hygiene?

“Activities of Daily Living” don’t have the cache’ of kineseotaping or therapeutic listening, but helping families improve the little things in life is something I haven’t ignored.  The basics of life are still the basics, and when they are a struggle, life gets harder.  Every single day.

Sometimes using SI techniques like the Wilbarger Protocol Can You Use The Wilbarger Protocol With Kids That Have Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome? makes self-care activities better, but sometimes you need a targeted approach.  This post describes some of my best strategies to make face-washing, tooth-brushing, dressing and bathing easier for kids to tolerate and they also help them to become independent at these important skills.  After all, one of the best techniques to reduce defensiveness/aversion is to have a child do the task independently.  They can control the pace, the amount of force and the timing.  And they are empowered.  So many kids with special needs develop the impression that they don’t have the ability to do things for themselves.

So check out my post on Therapro, and then go shopping for some of their terrific materials for your child or for your therapy practice!

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The view north from West Point.  Welcome spring!

OXO for Kids: Great Tableware For Older Kids With Sensory and Motor Issues

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Does your child knock over her milk on a daily basis?  Do utensils seem to fly out of your son’s hands?  I treat kids with hypermobility, coordination and praxis issues, sensory discrimination limitations, etc.; they can all benefit from this terrific line of cups, dinnerware and utensils.

Yes, OXO, the same people that sell you measuring cups and mixing bowls: they have a line of children’s products.  Their baby and toddler items are great, but no 9 year-old wants to eat out of a “baby plate”.

OXO’s items for older kids don’t look or feel infantile.   The simple lines hide the great features that make them so useful to children with challenges:

  1. The plates and bowls have non-slip bases.  Those little nudges that have other dinnerware flipping over aren’t going to tip these items over so easily.
  2. The cups have a colorful grippy band that helps little hands hold on, and the strong visual cue helps kids place their hands in the right spot for maximal control.
  3. The utensils have a larger handle to provide more tactile, proprioceptive and kinesthetic input while eating.  Don’t know what that is?  Don’t worry!  It means that your child gets more multi-sensory information about what is in her hand so that it stays in her hand.
  4. The dinnerware and the cups can handle being dropped, but they have a bit more weight (thus more sensory feedback) than a paper plate/cup or thin plastic novelty items.
  5. There is nothing about this line that screams “adaptive equipment”.  Older kids are often very sensitive to being labeled as different, but they may need the benefits of good universal design.  Here it is!
  6. All of them are dishwasher-safe.  If you have a child with special needs, you really don’t want to be hand-washing dinnerware if you don’t have to.

For more information about mealtime strategies, please take a look at Which Spoon Is Best To Teach Grown-Up Grasp? and Teach Spoon Grip By Making It Fun And Sharing a Laugh With Your Child.

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What Helps Sensitive Kids Handle Haircuts?

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Depending on your child’s age and issues, getting a haircut can be anything from a chore to a dreaded event that you put off, and then put it off a bit more.  So many kids fear them:  kids with ASD, kids with sensory issues, children that have had multiple hospitalizations or procedures, children with anxiety disorders.   I have been asked by parents of children well into grade school to help them with the problem of getting their child to the barber or hairdresser without a major fight.  My strategies are informed by my training as a pediatric OTR and as a Happiest Baby on the Block educator.

My approach to improving a child’s tolerance for a haircut is based on three goals: reduce the novelty of the experience, reduce the sensory impact of the haircut, and build their overall coping strategies based on their developmental level.

  1. You can borrow techniques from “exposure therapy” to make the experience of getting a haircut more familiar.  The very first step could be making combing or brushing their hair a non-event.  Explore what tool is the most comfortable for your child, and gradually introduce combs and even hair clippers.  Let them turn the clippers on and off ( establish safety rules first) and let them hear the clippers both far away and close to their ears.  Let them comb their hair first, then allow you to do so.  Washing their hair in the bath is another experience that you can use for pretending that you are giving them a haircut.  You can also get a bit wet and allow  them to pretend to cut your hair.  I have safety scissors that don’t cut anything but paper  Lakeshore Scissors for Toddlers That Only Cut the Paper, Not the Toddler  that work very well for this experience.  Expand grooming so that it can happen at different times of the day and in different locations in your home.  It needs to become as much of a non-issue as possible at home before a child is truly comfortable in the hair salon.
  2.  Remember that the entire experience of receiving a haircut has strong sensory components:  the salon and the sight, sound and smell of it’s other staff and customers, the tools used to cut hair, the feel of the chair and the drapes on your child.  They can all be contributors to agitation and aversion.  How can these be minimized?  Early appointments might be less crowded, there may be ways to apply water or lotions to reduce the experience of being sprayed, or children can be actively involved in saying that they are ready rather than feel attacked when they don’t expect touch.  Some kids just to be told before the event that their hair will be sprayed, or they need to feel in control of the timing.  Your child may seem too old to sit on your lap, but it could help them stay calm.  Ask if this is something they would like.  Your hairdresser is interested in doing a good job without a lot of drama.  Most of them will work with you.
  3. Many of the kids I see that struggle with haircuts also struggle handling frustration and anticipatory anxiety in general.  They are used to big dramatic exchanges when asked to do the things that are expected of them that they CAN tolerate.  These kids have often spent years developing a dance of refusal and opposition that they are now stuck in with their parents.  In my sessions, they quickly learn that I don’t engage this way; I am a no-drama girl.  I set limits and consequences, and I provide options so they feel they are working with me, not against me.  I use Dr. Harvey Karp’s Fast Food Rule and use all of his “Feed The Meter” strategies Turn Around Toddler Defiance Using “Feed the Meter” Strategies to build a sense of compassion and communication.  Both of these Happiest Toddler strategies work well with older children because anyone that is upset is thinking and behaving at a lower developmental level.  My best strategy is simple:  I stop a challenging task before a child has the chance to bail.  I may introduce another task that is similar and still offers challenge.  Stopping isn’t always ending the overall challenge.   The child’s experience is that they don’t have to fight to get a break, as for support or have adjustments made.  I am now their partner in learning to handle haircuts, dressing or nail cutting, not an authority making demands.
  4. Try not to minimize their distress, even if you can’t see why they feel that way.  In Why Telling Your Toddler “It’s OK” Doesn’t Work (And What To Do Instead)  , I wrote about how important it is to actively validate a child’s perspective.  with children that have sensory issues, this is huge, absolutely huge.

It is my belief that if you can help a child handle the daily challenges of their life with compassion, respect and skill development, that child will trust that you can help them with the other events in life that make them frightened or overwhelmed.  They have a new sense of how to manage their behavior, and believe that adults are resources for learning and partners in growth.

Looking for ideas on nail trimming or dressing as well? Read Why Cutting Nails Is Such a Challenge for Autistic and Sensory Kids and Dressing Without Tears: Sensory-Sensitive Strategies That Work

And don’t forget that my e-book on toilet training is out there to help you with this challenging skill:  The Practical Guide To Toilet Training Your Child With Low Muscle Tone isn’t just for kids with low tone; kids with ASD and sensory processing issues can use these strategies to build skills that help them make real progress quickly! You can buy my e-book on my website Tranquil Babies, at Your Therapy Source (a terrific site for OT workbooks and other products), and on Amazon.

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Teach Utensil Grasp and Control…Without the Food!

Therapro has just published my latest guest post! There are some situations that almost require occupational therapists to separate mealtime from utensil manipulation, at least at the earliest stages.  Check out my post Teaching Utensil Use Outside of the Mealtime Experience to find out if your child or client would benefit from this approach!

If you haven’t already read this very popular post I wrote earlier, make learning to use utensils an opportunity to bond emotionally,  take the pressure of self-feeding off the table and help an avoidant child engage in food play with Teach Spoon Grip By Making It Fun And Sharing a Laugh With Your Child.

Therapro has been one of my go-to sources for quality therapy equipment for years.  Take the time to review their catalog online and explore their unique bowls, plates and utensils that can help children with developmental delays achieve independence in self-feeding.

Hypermobile Kids, Sleep, And The Hidden Problem With Blankets

 

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Everyone knows that sleep is important.  Research in sleep science (yes, that is a thing) tells us that our brains are working to digest the day’s learning, the immune system is active during sleep, and our bodies are repairing and renewing tissues and organs while we slumber.  As much as we need sleep, kids need it more.  They are building the brains and bodies they will carry into their future.  Children need good quality sleep as much as they need healthy food.

Helping children to sleep well is usually a combination of creating good and consistent bedtime routines, giving them a full day of physical action and warm social interaction, and developing a healthy sleep environment.  This means providing a sleep-positive environment and removing any barriers to sleeping well.  But giving kids the chance to get a good night’s sleep can be harder when a child has hypermobility.

Some of the challenges to sleep for hypermobile kids are sensory-based, some are related to activity during the day, and some are orthopedic.  Here is a list of things that make sleep more challenging for these kids:

  • Children with limited proprioception and kinesthesia due to low tone or excessive joint mobility can have difficulty shifting down into a quiet state for sleep.  They spend their day seeking sensory input;  not moving reduces the sensory information that makes them feel calm and organized.  Being still is a bit similar to being in a sensory deprivation tank, and it’s not always calming.  To understand more about the sensory concerns of hypermobility, take a look at Hypermobility and Proprioception: Why Loose Joints Create Sensory Processing Problems for Children.
  • Some hypermobile kids have joint or muscle pain that keeps them up or wakes them up in the middle of the night.  Pain also makes kids more restless sleepers.  Restless sleepers thrash around a bit under the covers, becoming trapped in multiple layers of bed linens, or they can fall asleep in awkward positions that result in pain.
  • Children that are sedentary during the day for any reason (preference for tablet or video play, fatigue, pain, etc) may not be physically tired enough at night.  They may also be staying up too late at night.  Good sleep hygiene includes enough daytime activity combined with a conscious wind-down hours before bedtime occurs.
  • Some children with generalized low tone or joint hypermobility (especially with a connective tissue disorder) have issues with the partial collapse of their airway during sleep.  They snore or gasp in their sleep, and appear exhausted even after a full night’s sleep.  This is a serious issue.  Sleep apnea should be evaluated and addressed by a professional.
  • Hypermobile kids can get arms and legs caught in their bedclothes or between crib slats and mattresses.  Any layer can be a potential problem, from the sheet to the decorative afghan that Granny sent for his birthday.
  • Limbs can slide off the mattress during deep sleep and create strain on ligaments and tendons.   You and I depend on our brain to perceive an awkward position and take corrective action by waking us slightly.  The same child who “w” sits and slides off a chair without noticing is not going to wake up when her arm is hanging off the bed during sleep, even though the tissues are stretching beyond their typical range of motion.

Here are some simple strategies that may improve your child’s sleep:

  • Try a duvet or a flannel sheet set to minimize the number of layers of bedclothes.
  • Use a rashguard suit instead of pajamas.  I am particularly fond of the zip-front style so that less force is needed to get arms in and out while dressing.  You can peel it off more easily.  The lycra creates sensory feedback that can support body awareness while keeping them cozy.  An all-in-one suit also gives a bit of support so that limbs don’t easily overstretch.  A little bit of proprioceptive input in a breathable fabric that can also generate a bit of neutral warmth (from body heat) to keep tissues from getting too stiff.
  • Avoid footie sleepers that are too short.  Too-small footie sleepers create compressive forces on joints and could even encourage spinal torque.  Hypermobile kids will be the last ones to complain since they often don’t feel discomfort right away.  My preference is not to use these sleepers at all with hypermobile kids or kids with low tone.  See the next suggestion for another reason why I feel this way.
  • Make them take off those footie sleepers when they wake up and walk around.  As fabric twists and children stand/walk on the fabric, not the soles, it creates a safety risk underfoot.  Less sensory feedback and slippery soles!!  Get them dressed once they wake up.
  • Address sleep apnea, lack of daytime activity, and toilet training/scheduling rather than waiting for things to improve.  Not all young children achieve night time dryness on pace with other children, but ignoring the impact isn’t going to help things.
  • Carefully consider the issues before you try a weighted blanket.  Originally sold for kids on the autistic spectrum and for kids with sensory processing disorders without muscular or orthopedic issues, these blankets have become popular with other groups.  The biggest concern for hypermobile kids is that placing weight (meaning force) on an unstable joint over time without conscious awareness or adult monitoring is a safety issue.  It is possible to create ligament injury or even subluxation of a joint with weights, depending on limb position, length of time weight is applied, and the amount of force placed on a joint.  Talk the idea of a weighted blanket over with your OTR or PT before you order one of these blankets.
  • Consider aromatherapy, gentle massage, white noise machines, and other gentler sleep strategies to help your child sleep well.  For kids who sleep well but wake up stiff, learn how to use gentle massage and possibly heat to help them get going.  do not ignore pain at bedtime, or complaints of pain on awakening.  These are important clues that you need to address.   Ask your occupational therapist or your pediatrician for ideas to adapt your bedtime routine (OT)  or your pain plan (MD) to handle nighttime pain.
  • Try K-Taping or Hip Helpers for stability.  Kineseotape stays on for days and gives joint support and sensory input while your child sleeps.  Hip Helpers are snug lycra bike shorts that limit extreme hip abduction for the littlest kids ( when legs rotate out to the sides excessively).  They gently help your child align hip joints correctly.  As with weighted blankets, I strongly recommend consulting with your therapists to learn about how to use both of these strategies.  When used incorrectly, both can create more problems for your child.

Looking for more information about managing hypermobility in children?  Take a look at Should Your Hypermobile Child Play Sports? and Hypermobility and ADHD? Take Stability, Proprioception, Pain and Fatigue Into Account Before Labeling Behavior.

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