Category Archives: preschoolers

How To Get Your Special Needs Child To Sit Safely In The Tub

Bathtime is usually a fun experience for young children.  Toys, splashing, bubbles.  But it’s not always fun for parents.  If your child has issues with sensory sensitivity, sensory seeking or hypermobility, you can feel like a one-armed paperhanger; juggling toys, washcloth and child!

One solution is to use a bath seat.  A word of common sense first:  never leave a child unattended in any type of bath seat.  Just because these devices improve stability, they don’t remove all the risks of bathing in a tub.  Young children need to be supervised at all times.  But a tub seat does help a special needs child remain sitting and stable, and that can really help parents during bathing.  Here are the positive effects of using a bath seat or tub insert:

Kids with sensory seeking or sensory sensitivity can find the expanse of the standard tub overstimulating, and in response, they may become agitated or fearful.  The youngest kids can’t tell you how this feels.  They just act up.  Using a bath seat or a tub insert can allow these children to stay in the tub long enough to be washed, and help them stay calm and relaxed.  Since bath time is usually before bedtime, that is a big plus!

For kids with instability, the bath seat or insert can prevent them from injuring themselves if they tip or lean too much.  They could even build their ability to sit up if the seat is well-chosen for their needs.  These kids need to acquire a sense of independence, and if they are given the right support, they can start to sit without an adult holding them.  They may be able to use both hands more freely, developing coordination for learning to wash themselves and confidence in their independence.

Selecting the correct equipment can be easy or challenging.  After determining what level of assistance your child needs, figure out if your child fits well in the seat you are looking at.  Some seats are made for very small children.  If your child is older or larger, keep looking until you find equipment for them.  Therapy catalogs and sites have equipment for children with significant difficulties in holding their head up or maintaining a sitting position.  These are more expensive than mass-market items, but they are often adaptable and you can remove parts as your child builds their sitting skills and safety.

For more information about self-care and the special needs child, check out Kids With Low Muscle Tone Can Sit For Dinner: A Multi-Course StrategyImproving Daily Life Skills for Kids With Special Needs, and OXO for Kids: Great Tableware For Older Kids With Sensory and Motor Issues.

Are you toilet training your special needs child?  Do you worry that it may never happen?  I wrote the e-book for you!  The Practical Guide To Toilet Training Your Child With Low Muscle Tone is filled with readiness tips, techniques to find the best potty seat, and techniques to make learning faster and easier for both of you!  It is available on my website tranquil babies, and on Amazon and Your Therapy Source )a terrific site for parents and therapists).

 

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Not Making It To the Potty In Time? Three Reasons Why Special Needs Kids Have Accidents

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If your special needs child isn’t experiencing a medical reason for incontinence (infection, blockage, neurological impairment) then you might be facing one of these three common roadblocks to total training success:

  1. Your child has limited or incomplete interoceptive awareness.  What is interoception?  It is the ability to sense and interpret internal cues.  The distention of the bladder, the fullness of the colon, etc are all internal cues that should send them to the potty.  Unfortunately, just as poor proprioception can hinder a child’s ability to move smoothly, poor interception can result in potty accidents, among other things.  Working with them to become more aware of those feelings can include monitoring their intake and elimination routines.  You will know when they should have more sensory input, and can educate them about what that means.  Listen to how they describe internal feelings.  Kids don’t always know the right words, so use their words or give them a new vocabulary to help them communicate.
  2. Your child’s clothing is difficult to manage, or their dressing skills aren’t up to the task.  They run out of time before nature calls.  Tops that are hard to roll up, pants that have tricky fasteners, even fabrics that are hard to grasp and manipulate.  All of these can make it a few seconds too long once they get into the bathroom.  If you are not in there with them, you may have to ask them to do a “dry run” so you can see what is going on and what you can change to make undressing faster.  In my e-book, The Practical Guide To Toilet Training Your Child With Low Muscle Tone, I teach parents the best ways to teach dressing skills and the easiest clothing choices for training and beyond.  If you have ever had to “go” while in a formal gown or a holiday costume, you know how clothing choices can make it a huge challenge to using the toilet!
  3. Your child is too far from the bathroom when they get the “urge”.  Children  with mobility problems or planning problems may not think that they are in trouble right away.  They might be able to get to the bathroom in time in their own home.  When they are out in public or at school, the distance they have to cover can be significant, and barriers such as stairs or elevators can be an issue.  Even kids playing outside in their own yards might not be able to come inside in time.  If you can’t alter where they are, teach them to use the potty before they go outside or when they are near the bathroom, instead of waiting.  Taking the time to empty a half-full bladder is better than an accident.

Looking for more information on toilet training?  Read How To Teach Your Child To Wipe “Back There” and Low Tone and Toilet Training: Learning to Hold It In Long Enough to Make It to The Potty.  and of course, my e-book is available for more extensive assistance The Practical Guide to Toilet Training Your Child With Low Muscle Tone: Potty Training Help Has Arrived!

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Teaching Safety Awareness To Special Needs Toddlers

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Parents anxiously wait for their special needs infants to sit up, crawl and walk.  That last skill can take extra months or years.  Everyone, and I mean everyone, uses walking as a benchmark for maturity and independence.

They shouldn’t.  A child with poor safety awareness isn’t safer when they acquire mobility skills.  Sometimes they are much less safe.  Yes, they may be able to move without your help, but they may need to be more highly monitored and given more assistance to learn how to be safe.  They are exploring their environment and their new skills that took them a long time to develop.  They have been wanting to climb on the couch for months.  Now they can.  Getting down the “safe” way isn’t as important to them, and maybe not as easy as sliding or rolling off.  Oops.

What can parents do to help their child be a safer (notice I didn’t say “safe”) ambulator, crawler, cruiser, etc?  

  1. Talk about safety before they are independent.  Will they understand what it means?  Probably not, but your tone and your insistence on how movement is done says that you value safety and you want them to do the same.  Kids learn from all of our actions.  Make this one familiar to them by being very obvious and explicit.
  2. Take your physical therapist seriously when she or he teaches you how to work on core strength and balance skills.  Yes, I still maintain that safety is more than a sensory-motor skill, but having the best possible sensory and motor skills is important.  Having good safety awareness and safety behaviors without these skills will make a child more vulnerable to falls and injuries.
  3. The same goes for sensory processing activities.  If your child cannot perceive the movement of falling, the tactile and proprioceptive change as they crawl or step on something, or tolerate multiple sensory inputs at once, they are much less safe, even with good strength and coordination.  Really.
  4. Know your child’s cognitive and social/emotional skills.  Impulsive children are less safe overall.  Children that cannot process your instructions or recall them without you are less safe.  Children that enjoy defying you more than they want to avoid falling are less safe.  If you know any of these things, you can gauge safety and react more appropriately.  You will be less frustrated and more helpful to them.
  5. Reward safe execution and do not reward unsafe behavior.   My favorite way to avoid punishment but also to send my safety message home?  Not providing eye contact or much at all in the way of conversation as I stop unsafe actions, and either removing a child from an unsafe situation or assisting them in using the safe method to execute their move.  They get no satisfaction from seeing me react strongly, and they get the message that I am not accepting anything but their best safety skills as they move.
  6. Stop a child that is moving in an unsafe way, and see if they can recall and initiate the safe choice before assisting.  You don’t want to teach them that only you will make them safe and they need someone to be safe out there. They have to learn how to assess, react and respond, and all children can build their skills.  Some need more teaching, and some need more motivation to begin to take responsibility for their safety.  Give them both.

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Toilet Training For Preschool And Stuck in Neutral? Here’s Why…..

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Many of my clients are in a rush to get their kid trained in the next few weeks for school. They have been making some headway over the summer, but things can stall out half-way through.  Here are some common reasons (but probably not all of them) why kids hit a plateau:

  1. They lose that initial boost of excitement in achieving a “big kid” milestone.  Using the potty isn’t an accomplishment now, it is just a chore.
  2. Parents and caregivers aren’t able to keep up the emotional rewards they need.  It is hard to be as excited about the 10th poop in the potty as the first time.
  3. The rewards used aren’t rewarding anymore.  A sticker or a candy might not be enough to pull someone away from Paw Patrol.
  4. An episode of constipation or any other negative physical experience has them worried.  Even a little bit of difficulty can discourage a toddler.
  5. Too many accidents or not enough of a result when they are really trying can also discourage a child.
  6. Using the potty is now a power play.  Some kids need to feel in control, and foiling a parent’s goal of toileting gives them the feeling that they are the ones running the show.  “I won’t” feels so much better than “I did it” for these kids.
  7. Their clothes are a barrier.  When some families start training, it is in the buff or with just underwear.  Easy to make it to the potty in time.  With clothes on, especially with button-top pants or long shirts, it can be a race to get undressed before things “happen”.
  8. They haven’t been taught the whole process.  “Making” is so much more than eliminating.  Check out How To Teach Your Child To Wipe “Back There” and The Ten Most Common Mistakes Parents Make During Toilet Training for some ideas on how to teach the whole enchilada.

Should you pause training? The answer is not always to take a break.  I know it sounds appealing to both adults and kids, but saying that this isn’t important any longer has a serious downside.  If your child has had some success, you can keep going but change some of your approaches so that they don’t get discouraged or disinterested.  If your child really wasn’t physically or cognitively ready, those are good reasons to regroup.  But most typically-developing kids over 2 are neurologically OK for training.  They may need to develop some other skills to deal with the bumps in the road that come along for just about every child.

Sometimes addressing each one of these issues will move training to the next level quickly!  Take a look at this list and see if you can pick out a few that look like the biggest barriers, and hack away at them today!

For kids with low muscle tone, including kids with ASD and SPD, take a look at my e-book, The Practical Guide to Toilet Training Your Child With Low Muscle Tone.  Read Why Low Muscle Tone Creates More Toilet Training Struggles for Toddlers (and Parents!) to understand why I wrote this book just for you!   

I give parents clear readiness guidelines and tips on everything from the best equipment, the best way to handle fading rewards, to using the potty outside of your home.  It also includes an entire chapter on overcoming these bumps in the road! To learn more about what my e-book can do for you, read The Practical Guide to Toilet Training Your Child With Low Muscle Tone: Potty Training Help Has Arrived!

Calm Your Toddler By Using “Tummy Time” for Emotional Modulation

 

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You don’t have to offer your child a tablet.  Try a book or a sticker activity instead!

Yes, tummy time.  It isn’t just for babies anymore.

Why?  Because occupational therapists know that the physical effects of working against gravity to push one’s head and shoulders up, and the firmness and warmth of contact with the floor are also sensory-based modulation strategies.  What helps babies build core control can also calm upset or disorganized toddlers and older kids.

The decrease in visual input can improve calmness and attention for those kids whose eyes dart everywhere.  Not everyone can handle a visual stimulating room.  Some children need more vestibular input to reorganize, but some do better with the stillness of “tummy time”.

How long do they need to be on their stomachs for this to work?  It depends.  Probably more than a few minutes, but if you haven’t seen signs of better modulation (better eye contact, slower breathing, more communication, less agitation) then you might need to layer on another technique  Help Your Child Develop Self-Regulation With Happiest Toddler On The Block or the Wilbarger Protocol Can You Use The Wilbarger Protocol With Kids That Have Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome?.

Having trouble convincing your child to lie on their belly?  Join them, or get a sibling to model it.  Make a special new book collection for tummy time, and only have it available at that time.  Get a tent, and add the effects of an enclosed space to tummy time to make it more deeply calming.

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KickStart Kindergarten: Get Your Child Ready for Kindergarten Writing The Easy Way!

 

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Starting kindergarten is so exciting for most kids, but learning to write can be challenging for those children that have fASD, SPD, fine motor or visual-motor issues.  Even though fewer and fewer teachers know how to teach handwriting well, it is still a necessary skill for young children.  Learning Without Tears has developed an amazing book that can help your child build skills faster and easier:  Kickstart Kindergarten!

Why Writing (Still) Really Matters

There are research studies that suggest that the physical act of forming letters positively affects memory and comprehension.  These studies suggest the benefits continue all the way through into college-level instruction.  Handwriting is a multi-sensory experience.  The brain is using many different areas of the brain are involved in organizing and coordinating it’s tasks to execute the ability to write.  Young brains need to practice and achieve a high level of coordinated activity before they can focus on comprehension and critical thinking.

The demands of writing create neural activity that could be considered  “brain exercise”.   I know I see it that way.  Taking notes at the high school and college level requires synthesis; the cognitive act of summarizing and condensing a lecture into a shorter message that you write down quickly.  It is a mental skill not required when you take verbatim notes on a laptop.  Oops.

Simply put, the reason keyboarding and digital access isn’t enough is simple:  by the time struggling writers are able to put their thoughts into words in a digital format, they have already developed frustration and even aversion to engaging in writing in any form.  

This is unacceptable to me.  Clever and creative kids are learning to dislike language arts because they can’t write with enough skill and speed.  I have struggling writers ask me: “How many words do I need in each sentence, and how many sentences”  This isn’t making them develop their ability to compose anything.  It is making them hate language arts.  At a time where communication skills are essential to success at any profession.

Kickstart Kindergarten:  Fun, Well-Designed, and Easy to Teach:

This workbook is the one you want to give your new preschool graduate this summer!  Filled with activities that boost the automaticity needed to go to kindergarten.

Here are some, but not all, of the terrific features of this workbook:

  • As with all HWT books, the paper is sturdy and won’t tear with repeated erasing or careless handling.
  • The individual letter pages start with tracing and fade to independence.
  • The gray boxes help kids with consistent and age-appropriate sizing and avoid reversals.  BTW, reversals are normal at this age.  Preventing reversals is even better than correcting them.  This book does both.
  • Each sample is placed near the space available for a child to write.  They don’t need to move their hand or copy the errors they made in the previous attempt (big issue for any kid with ocular control issues or visual organization issues!)
  • Letters are grouped into developmentally-correct bunches, based on the later pre-K motor developmental milestones.  This means that an “A” isn’t the first letter learned.  Letters that are all vertical and horizontal lines are the easiest to form, so they are first.
  • There are still coloring opportunities and plenty of chances to repeat and practice.
  • They include pages for parents and teachers to use as formation references.  You can’t teach writing if you aren’t sure how a letter is supposed to be formed.  I will confess that after taking the evaluation course, I found out that I have some very bad habits that probably date back to preschool.  And never got fixed.
  • Numbers are not ignored.  Numbers are presented in order, but their formation is actually not far from a developmental progression.

Here are some shots to get you excited about this book:

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Is your child entering first grade but in need of more practice?  These books aren’t going to make them feel self-conscious about needing help.  Take off the cover if you are worried that they will be embarrassed to use a book with Kindergarten int he title.  And tell them that this is the easiest way to get better at handwriting …fast!  You have their back, as always!

Three Ways To Reduce W-Sitting (And Why It Matters)

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Children who sit on the floor with their thighs rolled inward and their calves rotated out to the sides are told that they are “W-sitting”.  Parents are told to reposition their kids immediately.  There are even garments like Hip Helpers that make it nearly impossible to sit in this manner.  Some therapists get practically apoplectic when they see kids sitting this way.  I get asked about W-sitting no less than 3x/week, so I though I would post some information about w-sitting, and some simple ways to address this without aggravating your child or yourself:

  1. This is not an abnormal sitting pattern.  Using it all the time, and being unable to sit with stability and comfort in other positions…that’s the real problem.  Typically-developing kids actually sit like this from time to time.  When children use this position constantly, they are telling therapists something very important about how they use their bodies.  But abnormal?  Nah.
  2. Persistent W-sitting isn’t without consequence just because it isn’t painful to your child.  As a child sits in this position day after day, some muscles and ligaments are becoming overstretched.  This creates points of weakness and instability, on top of any hypermobility that they may already display.  Other muscles and ligaments are becoming shorter and tighter.  This makes it harder for them to have a wide variety of movements and move smoothly from position to position.  Their options for rest and activity just decreased.  Oops.
  3. Sitting this way locks a child into a too-static, too-stable sitting position.  This appeals to the wobbly child, the weak child, and the fearful child, but it makes it harder for them to shift and change position.  Especially in early childhood, developing coordination is all about being able to move easily, quickly and with control.  There are better choices.
  4. A child who persistently W-sits is likely to get up and walk with an awkward gait pattern.   All that over-stretching and over-tightening isn’t going to go away once they are on their feet.  You will see the effects as they walk and run.  It is the (bad) gift that keeps on giving.

What can you do?

Well, good physical and occupational therapy can make a huge difference, but for today, start by reducing the amount of time they spend on the floor.  There are other positions that allow them to play and build motor control:

  • Encourage them to stand to play.  They can stand at a table, they can stand at the couch, they can stand on a balance disc.  Standing, even standing while gently leaning on a surface, could be helping them more than W-sitting.
  • Give them a good chair or bench to sit on.  I am a big fan of footstools for toddlers and preschoolers.  They are stable and often have non-skid surfaces that help them stay sitting.  They key is making sure their feet can be placed flat on the floor with their thighs at or close to level with the floor.  This should help them activate their trunk and hip musculature effectively.
  • Try prone.  AKA “tummy time”, it’s not just for babies.  This position stretches out tight hip flexors and helps kids build some trunk control.  To date, I haven’t met one child over 3 who wouldn’t play a short tablet game with me in this position.  And them we turn off the device and play with something else!

For more strategies for hypermobile kids, take a look at Picking The Best Trikes, Scooters, Etc. For Kids With Low Tone and Hypermobility and How Hypermobility Affects Self-Image, Behavior and Activity Levels in Children.

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