Category Archives: book review

A Practical Guide to Helping the Hypermobile School-Age Child Succeed

 

The Joint Smart Child.inddThe JointSmart Child series started off in 2019 with Volume One:  The Early Years.  It is finally time for the school-age child to have their needs addressed!

Volume Two:  The School Years is available now on Amazon as an e-book, filled with information to make life at home and at school easier and safer.  This book is equally at home on a parent’s or a pediatric therapist’s shelf.   Filled with clear explanations for the daily struggles hypermobile children encounter, it answers the need for a practical reference guide for daily living:

Section I reviews the basics:  understanding the many ways that hypermobility can affect motor, sensory and social/emotional development.  General principles for positioning and safety are presented in easy-to-follow language.

Section II addresses daily living skills such as dressing, bathing and mealtime.  School-age kids may not be fully independent in these areas, and they need targeted strategies to improve their skills while boosting their confidence.

Section III looks at school and recreational activities.  It covers handwriting and keyboarding, playing sports and playing musical instruments with less fatigue, less pain, and more control.  When parents and therapists know how to select the best equipment and use optimal ergonomics and safety guidelines, kids with hypermobility really can thrive!

Section IV reviews the communication skills in Volume One, and then expands them to address the more complex relationships within and outside the family.  Older children can have more complex medical needs such as pain management, and knowing how to communicate with medical professionals empowers parents.

The extensive appendix provides informational forms for parents to use with babysitters and teachers, and checklists for chairs and sports equipment such as bikes.  There is a checklist parents can use during IEP meetings to ensure that their child’s goals include issues such as optimal positioning, access, and endurance in school.  Therapists can use the same materials as part of their home program or in professional presentations to parent groups.  There are even simple recipes to use cooking as a fun activity that develops sensory and motor skills!

I believe that this e-book has so much to offer parents and therapists that have been looking for practical information, but find they have to search around the internet only to rely on other parents for guidance instead of health care professionals.  This is the book that answers so many of their questions and empowers children to reach their highest potential!

for more information on how to help your hypermobile child, read Need a Desk Chair for Your Hypermobile School-Age Child? Check out the Giantex Chair and Should Hypermobile Kids Sit On Therapy Balls For Schoolwork? plus Should Hypermobile Kids Use Backpacks?

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Raising a Gifted Child? Read “A Parent’s Guide to Gifted Children” For Successful Strategies To Navigate the Waters

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Raising a gifted child isn’t all rainbows and first place ribbons.  Especially in the early years, the intensity, drive and complexity that gifted children bring to the table can come out looking like bossiness, perfectionism and extreme sensitivity  How To Spot A Gifted Child In Your Preschool Class (Or Your Living Room!).  Many books try to explain why gifted individuals are challenging, but this book is unique. It is offering parents clear strategies to help their child thrive and help them navigate school and social activities with confidence.

A Parent’s Guide to Gifted Children is written by four leaders in gifted education and research.  James Webb, PhD, was a strong supported of the gifted community and gifted children in particular.  The other authors; Janet Gore M.Ed., Edward Amend Psy.D and Arlene DeVries M.S.E., are all specialists in this area.  They offer useful information about both the benefits of giftedness and the challenges in every chapter.

This book is unique in many ways.  It offers solid parenting advice, not theories and research studies.  Gifted children are still children who require support, limits, education and love.   The authors are eager to give parents tools to make life at home and school easier.  Gifted kids can be misunderstood, teased or excluded. Dealing with this is not easy for any parent.  They even acknowledge that parents themselves may be criticized or mocked for advocating for their child’s needs.  The chapter on what to do if your child is twice-exceptional (for example, having a learning disability in addition to giftedness) address getting help for both skills and areas of challenge.  It also helps parents consider whether their child’s diagnosis is accurate.  Many characteristics of giftedness can be seen incorrectly as ADHD, bipolar illness or ASD.  Getting the right diagnosis is essential to maximizing your child’s abilities and happiness.

One aspect of giftedness that is rarely addressed in this much detail but is solidly reviewed here is the emotional sensitivity often seen at an early age.  This book spends considerable space on helping parents teach their gifted children how to handle frustration, perfectionism, and even existential depression.  What is that?  A child that can comprehend the level of danger and inequality in the world at a young age may not have the emotional ability to come to terms with this knowledge.  The authors do a terrific job of explaining the sources of  a gifted child’s pain and offer concrete advice to parents.

There is so much to say about the joys and the pitfalls of parenting gifted children of any age.  This book does an excellent job of helping families (and educators) see the road ahead and handle it well.

Looking for more practical strategies that work?  I am in the process of writing an e-book on occupational therapy and the young gifted child.  In the meantime, read Gifted Child? Try “How Does Your Engine Run” For Sensory ProcessingDoes Your Gifted Child Interrupt You Constantly? Respond This Way For Better Results and Why Gifted Children Aren’t Their Teacher’s Favorite Students….

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Teens With Chronic Illness Or Disability Need A Good Guide: Read “Easy For You To Say”

bagas-vg-426755Being a tween or teen isn’t easy, but having a chronic physical illness or disability (not interchangeable) can make it extremely difficult.  Kids aren’t always great at asking for help or even answering questions, so this wonderfully useful book has done the groundwork for you.

Dr. Miriam Kaufman’s book Easy For You To Say is an easy-to read format of questions and answers that is accessible for teens to read and parents of teens will learn a tremendous amount as well.  She has a significant amount of experience with this subject, and has plenty of solid medical knowledge to back up her information.

As a physician, you will find that she includes a great deal of medical information, including medication lists related to teen concerns such as acne and sexual response and functioning.  These lists, of course, are dated the minute the book is published, but the general categories of drugs that have effects that concern teens is helpful as a starting point for discussions with a pediatrician or specialist.

This book isn’t just about the medical concerns that occur with physical illness and disability.  Dr. Kaufman covers the challenges of relationships of all kinds, and practical issues with school, work, and having fun as a teenager while dealing with significant issues.  This book doesn’t mince words but is unfailingly positive.  Kids (and parents of teens) really need that positivity while trying to launch into a life of more independence.  She is a strong proponent of self-advocacy that doesn’t become militant but is always life-affirming.  There is some discussion of higher education and career planning, which is so essential Career Planning for Teens with JRA, EDS, and Other Chronic Health Issues.

This book has it’s limitations.  It doesn’t address cognitive disabilities or psychiatric disabilities like living with bipolar illnesses, nor does it speak about ASD or SPD.  These issues can co-occur in the same teen, and it is then that you might want to think about what an OT has to offer.  This author doesn’t even mention us as helpful professionals that do more than, if you can believe it, help kids look at career options.  Perhaps she missed the class on what “occupation” really references.  Oh well.

As an occupational therapist, I wish my profession had been mentioned as a greater resource for disabled teens, but perhaps I should not be that surprised that it is left out.  Most physicians aren’t aware of how OTs can meaningfully assist kids past the Early Intervention years to enhance their functioning and learn both better skills and work-arounds to accomplish what they would like to do in life.  For example, her book speaks in great detail about the complications of mobility and coordination limitations during sexual activity.  Since just about every teen is curious about this subject, an occupational therapist could help them adapt their environment, equipment and movements to make this part of ADLs a success on many fronts.  Dr. Kaufman has a lot of ideas, but the specifics for each teen are going to be different, and that is where OTs shine.

This book should be on the shelf of most pediatric physiatrists, and most OTs.  It is now on mine!  If your child is no longer a child, I recommend “Life Disrupted” by Laurie Edwards.  This book covers the situations that young adults in their 20’s really need to figure out.  Specifically, learning how to craft a career, develop relationships and become independent when you are dealing with a chronic illness.  None of it is easy, but the author is both supportive and realistic.  I think that helps more than platitudes and positivity without, as Dr. Phil might say, putting verbs in the sentences.

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Construction Site on Christmas Night: A New Classic Is Born!

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Anyone that knows the board book Goodnight, Goodnight, Construction Site should run right out and get this one for next week.  OK, maybe you won’t be able to wait that long.   Read it when you get it home!  An absolutely read it before your young child goes to bed on Christmas Eve!  Santa will wait a little longer for his cookies and milk.

The graphics are just detailed enough, but not so complex that most 2 year-olds can’t figure out what is going on.  There is some repetition so they can keep up with the story, but older kids can follow the concepts of kindness and caring in relationships.  The rhyming text is terrific for kids learning phonics.   Rhyming has been working out well for audiences of all ages, even before Shakespeare’s iambic pentameter.  Works for me, too!  This is a fun book for parents to read out loud, which is good because you will be reading it over and over, night after night, long after the decorations are packed away.

The construction vehicles in the story end up building a new fire house for the fire engines, but they get some treats for themselves as well.  It is a happy story with a lot of warmth and a wonderful chance to talk about how good it feels to give.

Enjoy this fun little book during the holiday season!

A Great Toilet Training Book for Neurotypical Kids: Oh Crap Potty Training!

sean-wells-471209My readers know that I wrote an e-book on potty training kids with low tone ( The Practical Guide to Toilet Training Your Child With Low Muscle Tone: Potty Training Help Has Arrived! ) but I have to admit, I learn a lot from other authors.  Jamie Glowacki  has written a terrific book that speaks clearly and directly to parents who aren’t sure they are up to the challenge of toilet training.  Oh Crap Potty Training is a funny title, but it is filled with useful ideas that help parents understand their toddler better and understand training needs so they can tackle this major life skill with humor and love.  I have to admit, I am really happy that she suggests parents of kids with developmental issues ask their OT for advice.  So few parents actually do!

Here are a few of her concepts that illustrate why I like her book so much:

  1. She gets the situation toddlers find themselves in:  using the potty is a total change in a comforting daily routine.  Jamie points out that since birth, your child has only known elimination into a diaper.  The older they are when you start training, the longer they have been using diapers.  WE are excited to move them on, but they can be afraid to sit, afraid to fail, and afraid of the certainty of the diaper always being there.  You can’t NOT get it in the diaper!  She also gets the power struggle that can be more enticing to an emerging personality after about 30 months of age.  Just saying, she gets it.
  2. Potty training success opens meaningful doors for kids, diapers keep them back.  Some great activities and some wonderful schools demand continence to attend.  By the time your child is around 3, they can feel inferior if they aren’t trained, but not be able to tell you.  They express it with anxiety or anger.  If you interpret it as not being ready, you aren’t helping them.
  3. Some kids will NEVER be ready on their own.  I know I am going to get some pushback on this one, and she already says she gets hate mail for saying it.  But there is a small subset of kids who will need your firm and loving direction to get started.   Waiting for readiness isn’t who they are.  If you are the parent of one of these kids, you know she’s right.  Your kid hasn’t been ready for any transition or change.  You have had to help them and then they were fine.  But this is who they are, and instead of waiting until the school makes you train her or your in-laws say something critical to your child, it might be OK to make things happen rather than waiting.
  4. You must believe that you are doing the right thing by training your child.  They can smell your uncertainty, and it will sink your ship.  She really sold me on her book with this one.  As a pediatric therapist, I know that my confidence is key when instructing parents in treatment techniques for a home program.  If I don’t know that I am recommending the right strategy, I know my doubt will show and nothing will go right.

If you are looking for some ideas on training kids of all stripes and needs, check out my posts  For Kids Who Don’t Know They Need to “Go”? Tell Them to Stand Up and Toilet Training For Preschool And Stuck in Neutral? Here’s Why…...  Of course, if your child has low muscle tone or hypermobility, my e-book will help you understand why things seem so much harder, and what you can do to make potty training a success!

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And She Rescues Him Right Back: An Early Reader For The Young Feminist

 

 

marc-zimmer-421611If you like the movie “Pretty Woman”, you will know this reference.  I have always been conflicted about this popular adult fairy tale, even though I adore the two stars and the clever screenplay.  In fact, I have wished at times that the roles were reversed.

Apparently, there is a children’s book for that (clean version).

The Paper Bag Princess by Robert Munsch is the story of a princess who rescues her prince from a dragon using intelligence, creativity, bravery, and humor.  Sort of like Nancy Drew, but in shorter book for younger children, with a dragon, and with more humor than Nancy usually displayed.  Nancy was spunky and smart, but she often had to get help from Ned to finish the deal.  Not this time.

A fun book for reading/comprehension levels K-2, the princess is the hero of the story for once.  In real life, we know that women are often the heroes at home and at work.  They just don’t get the recognition.  They do in this little book!  In fact, it could be the gateway to learning about Marie Curie and other real women who have done amazing things.

I think girls need to hear about themselves as heroes, and boys need to hear it too.  Kinda helps to balance out all the Grimm tales and the Marvel comics out there.  So take a look at this book and add it to your library!

The Practical Guide to Toilet Training Your Child With Low Muscle Tone: Potty Training Help Has Arrived!

photo-1445800363697-51e91a1edc73  Toilet Training Help Has Arrived!             

My most popular post,  Why Low Muscle Tone Creates More Toilet Training Struggles for Toddlers (and Parents!) inspired me to write a manual to help parents with potty training.  There was nothing in books or online that really helped families, just a few lines about being patient and not pushing children….which is no help at all! Families deserve good strategies and an explanation for all the frustration they experience.

What makes this book so unique?  Media specialists say that you have to be able to explain your product in the time it takes for the average elevator ride.  OK, here is my elevator speech on The Practical Guide to Toilet Training Your Child With Low Muscle Tone:

My book provides a complete explanation of the motor, sensory, and social/emotional effects that low muscle tone has on toilet training.  It does so without being preachy or clinical.  Parents understand whether their child is ready to train, and how to start creating readiness immediately.  They learn how to pick the right potty seat, the right clothes, and how to decide between the “boot camp” or gradual method of training.  A child’s speech delays, defiance or disinterest in potty training are addressed in ways that support families instead of criticizing them.

  • Each readiness quiz helps parents figure out what issues need to be addressed for successful training and reminds them of their child’s strengths.
  • Chapter summaries give a quick review of each section.  Parents decide which chapter they need to read next to get more information.
  • Clinical information is explained in layman’s terminology, so parents don’t have to Google “interoception” to understand the neurology that causes a child not to recognize that they have a full bladder.

Here’s what parents are saying about The Practical Guide”:

The Practical Guide has truly been heaven sent!  Although my globally delayed 5-year old daughter understood the idea of toileting, this skill was certainly not mastered.  Our consultations with Cathy and her guide on how to toilet train have given me the knowledge I’ve needed to understand low tone as a symptom that can be tackled.  Morgan has made visible advances, and I am so encouraged and empowered because I know what piece we need to work on next.  Thank you, Cathy, for writing this book!”      Trish C, mother of Morgan, 5 years old

“I would often say to myself “Cathy has to put all of her accumulated wisdom down into a book”.  I am happy to say-here it is!  You will find no one with more creative and practical  solutions.  Her insights and ideas get the job done!”     Laura D. H., mother of M., 4 years old 

Cathy has been a “go-to’ in every area imaginable, from professional referrals to toilet training.  I can’t say enough positive things about her.  She has been so insightful and helpful on this journey.”  Colleen S. mother of two special needs children

Want a bit of a preview?  Here is a small section from Chapter One: Are You Ready For Toilet Training?  Is Your Child?

Parents decide to start toilet training for three primary reasons.  Some families train in anticipation of an outside event, such as enrolling their toddler in a preschool that doesn’t change diapers.  Another example would be the impeding birth of a sibling  Parents who want to train their older child hope that they can avoid having two children in diapers, They do not expect to have the time and attention for training after their new baby arrives.

The second common reason to begin training is when their child achieves a skill that parents believe to be a precursor to successful toileting.  For example, when children learn a word or a sign for urination, adults may thing that they may finally be able to train them.  The final reason is when school staff or their pediatrician recommends that they start training.  whatever your reason, you are reading this book because you are wondering if you and/or your child could be ready for toilet training.

These are the eight types of toileting readiness: 

  1. Financial
  2. Physiological
  3. Communication 
  4. Cognitive 
  5. Social/emotional 
  6. Clothing Management
  7. Time and Attention
  8. Appropriate Equipment

How can you find my book?

Three ways:  Visit my website  tranquil babies and click on “e-book” at the top of the homepage, buy it on Amazon, or visit  Your Therapy Source, a wonderful site for parents and therapists.  Just search for The Practical Guide to Toilet Training Your Child With Low Muscle Tone!

 

Need more than toilet training strategies?

 My new e-book, The JointSmart Child:  Living and Thriving With Hypermobility Volume One:  The Early Years is for you!  Like The Practical Guide, it has solutions to everyday problems, but this book also gives you strategies to make your child and your home safer, have mealtime and dressing successes, and even learn how to communicate better with your family, babysitter, teacher and doctor!  Find it on Amazon.com.  It is also available as a printable download on Your Therapy Source.

HELP HAS ARRIVED!

The Informed Parent and Happiest Baby on the Block

I read The Informed Parent recently to decide whether it would be a good resource for my clients, and found that the chapters on The Art and Science of Baby Soothing, SIDS, and Sleep Training were worth reading.  This book distills a lot, a whole lot, of research that can confuse those parents who want some clarity in a sea of recommendations. The problem?  The authors, Tara Haelle and Emily Willingham, left me wanting for some good resources to offer parents once they have made their own conclusions about the available research.  They did do something wonderful for me as a Happiest Baby educator:  they included many, many research references to the 5 S’s that support the use of Dr. Karp’s techniques to calm newborns.  If you ever wondered whether swaddling is bad for your baby’s hips or whether pacifiers would help or hurt your chances of successful breastfeeding, the authors have some science-based answers for you.

As an example of what their book offers parents, the chapter on sleep training appeared to summarize all of the research findings by saying that bad sleepers aren’t necessarily disturbed or deficient.  The most helpful conclusion was that children whose parents were available to them emotionally during the bedtime period had fewer sleep disruptions. Parents might be feel less guilty but this won’t help anyone go to sleep.  If a parent is frustrated, tired, and distracted, and has an authoritarian approach to sleep: “Go to sleep NOW, because I said so!”, I believe that they are more likely to end up with a child that doesn’t want to go to sleep at bedtime, and screams for bottles or cuddles at 4 am.  But how exactly does this observation help anyone?  Perhaps there are parents that recognize themselves in that description and decide to change, but I suggest that most of us do not see ourselves as emotionally unavailable, even when we are.   My experience is that the parent-child pairs I have met who have an insecure-resistant mode of attachment (psych-speak for a child that desires parent contact but then reacts angrily or is resistant/fussy when given attention) are completely oblivious to how they contribute to their child’s behavior.   It is going to take more that a summary of scientific studies to have parents recognize the effect of their interactions on sleep problems.

I was disappointed that the authors included the “Purple crying” concept of Dr. Ronald Barr in their discussion of parents that shake a persistently crying infant.  Nothing in this  “approach” is scientific.  Telling parents that colicky crying is normal, but not offering more than “put the baby down and don’t shake him” is reprehensible when methods such as Dr. Karp’s 5 S’s  have actually helped so many families.  Of course shaking is never OK!  I really doubt that anyone that has had a screaming infant has ever felt that “knowing that crying is common and not abnormal” was very helpful.  What you want at that point to avoid doing something harmful is a solution, not a platitude.

Read The Informed Parent and let me know what was helpful and what just made you want some successful easy-to-use strategies for babies and toddlers!

To schedule a in-home training with me in the NYC metro area, or to buy a phone/video consult, visit my website and select the service that fits your needs.  

 

Defiant Kids Can Change With Dr. Kazdin’s Simple Plans

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Dr. Alan Kazdin wrote “The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child” in 2008. His follow-up book, “The Everyday Parent Toolkit” came later.   He is the director of the Yale Parenting Center, and he has seen some hardcore kids.  You do not get the feeling that he has treated a lot of children younger than 2, and based on the techniques he uses, it seems like a child would need more cognition and language than a young toddler to respond well without adaptations.   Not a problem: Dr. Karp created the Happiest Toddler on the Block, and he has done a great job dealing with defiant 18-month-olds.   Read Why Telling Your Child “It’s OK” Doesn’t Calm Him Down (And What To Do Instead) and  Toddler Demands? Give it in Fantasy! for some good strategies that work.  if you r preschool child has already lobbed some hateful statements at you, read What To Say When Your Child Says “I Hate You!” .  But if your kindergartener refuses to go to bed or your teenager won’t do her homework, this Kazdin guy has really helpful ideas for you!

Dr. Alan Kazdin’s books can change the dynamic for families that feel their life is one battle after another.  If you have embraced the idea that you can target defiance through behavioral science, then he is already preaching to your choir. If not, you might be wary. The funny thing is, when you are using the program, it doesn’t feel that much like science.  You feel like you are connecting with your child’s better nature.  He has crafted strategies that really work.  The biggest drawback is that if you make too many beginner mistakes it will seem as if it is never going to work.  I recommend that parents actually read the books and understand the principles he is using to change a child’s behavior.  This is one of those techniques that you can’t learn in a 900-word article in a magazine.  You might be inspired in a short article, but you won’t learn enough to “take it on the road” and really use it.

Bonus:  understanding a child’s behavior helps us understand the impact of rewards and consequences on our bosses, our mates and on ourselves!

I liked his first book, but I don’t think it took off in parenting circles.   I am going to guess that his first book was a little intimidating for some parents, as it does a very thorough job of explaining how behavioral plans work.  Not every parent wants to think of their star chart in terms like “positive reinforcers” and letting go of the chart as “extinction of reinforcers with intermittent rewards”.  His second book, “The Everyday Parent Toolkit” is a little more user-friendly, but still gets his message across.  The truth is that all of our interactions can be viewed through a behavioral lens.  When a child is refusing to do their homework, telling you that you are the worst parent ever, and then breaking the lamp, it might be time to explore a strategy that takes out some of the drama and focuses on how you really want your evening to go.

Dr. Kazdin is very focused on positive interactions and warm exchanges. He is aware that adult stressors make reacting calmly to a screaming child harder, and screaming children create stress for adults.  He has sympathy for everyone, but sees parents as the agent of change in this situation.  He is like the white-coated scientist with a “Mr. Rogers” sweater on underneath!

My suggestion:  read both books and think about how to start out small.  Attack a small problem behavior first, then refine your approach as you address some of the bigger defiant behaviors.  And consider reading “The Happiest Toddler on the Block” if your child has a cognitive age of less than 6.  Many of those techniques will be even easier to implement and work very well to smooth out the waters so that Kazdin’s techniques work better and faster!

Not sure you want to do this alone?  Visit my website tranquil babies and purchase a consultation session.  I do phone sessions with parents to help them craft a plan and provide support along the way.  Being able to ask questions and tell your story can make such a difference in how you see your child and yourself!

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For Rosh Hashanah, Some Zitzfleish?

Pamela Druckerman, the author of “Bringing Up Bebe”, has written a NYT piece, “Learning How to Exert Self-Control” on 9/12/14. She reviews a new book by Dr. Walter Mischel, the primary researcher of the famous test of self-control in young children that you know as “the marshmallow test”.

Dr. Mischel has a new book out, and Ms. Druckerman’s article reviews the concepts and also provides some insights into how children and adults can build the ability to leave the Doritos alone, stick with a savings plan, or just not eat that marshmallow.

I will try to remember his suggestions when I create my own New Year’s resolutions.

Do Fathers Matter? NYT Reviews the Question

The NYT has reviewed a new book, “Do Fathers Matter” by Paul Raeburn. The assumption is that they make unique contributions to their children’s lives before, during, and after conception.

This book explores the science behind this belief. Some researchers are studying the benefits that come from having involved and caring men in children’s lives. Equally interesting are the effects of paternal age and health at conception. New studies suggest that male health is an important consideration in fertility and risk for a wide range of issues. The effects of a fathers’ parenting style in early childhood to affect behavior in adolescence and adulthood is worth considering. No one doubts this, but seeing the research clarifies why we should care deeply about a father’s role in a child’s life.

This book appears to bring social, psychological and biological research together in a readable form, so I will be eager to take a look this summer!

Father’s Day Book Review: The Art of Roughhousing

I know, I know; do you really need a book to tell you why and how to toss your son in the air so he screams with joy? Maybe. Anthony T.DeBenedet, M.D. and Lawrence J. Cohen, Ph.D have written a fun and quite comprehensive manual for you. You will learn why roughhousing is good for your child’s emotional and social health, and when to say when. Most moms are hoping that part is included.
Pediatric occupational therapists will totally support the recommendation to closely observe your child and match/manage the action for safety and mutual enjoyment. Children with sensory processing issues generally love roughhousing but aren’t particularly good at managing their excitement. Here’s your manual for figuring that part into your plan.

The Book spends the first 34 of it’s 190 pages explaining why these dads love roughhousing and the theory of how roughhousing helps families. They are clear about setting limits for safety, but open to very creative play. That’s when the real excitement starts. They use useful illustrations and step-by-step descriptions of moves like the Ninja Warrior and the Magic Carpet Ride. Moves are categorized by level of difficulty and some essential skills needed to execute them. Hint: you will need to be in fairly good shape for most of these. Parenting at this level is going to be all the excuse you need to get to the gym.

Parents who would like to understand the science behind roughhousing and/or need some creative ideas to start the fun will get the most out of this little volume!

Tantrum Taming With Special Needs Toddlers

Toddler tantrums are difficult to handle in the first place. The screaming, throwing and hitting can come as a wave of emotion that overwhelms and frightens both the child and the parent. When you have a toddler that may be emotionally age-appropriate but has difficulty expressing thoughts or understanding language, and add trouble handling sensory information, and you have a real problem. These children need our best efforts to help them navigate these waters.

Some special needs children remain at the toddler stage beyond the 18-4 year range. Those children are especially prone to explosions, as some of their abilities race ahead of skill acquisition (language, movement, self-calming) that would help them cope with emotional turmoil.

If you cannot reason with a special needs child who is having a tantrum, what can you do? Although he did not create his techniques for this population, Dr. Harvey Karp’s toddler communication techniques have been very effective for me in my work. He emphasizes gestures/facial expression and use repeated short phrases. Solving the cause of the tantrum comes AFTER acknowledging the child’s feelings. I will not say that every tantrum has evaporated, but I have seen simply amazing results.

The hardest part for me was that his primary technique requires me to sound, well, like a toddler. Communicating with a child in such a simple, primitive way took some practice. But looking incompetent in front of his parents wasn’t so wonderful either.

Dr. Karp’s book “the Happiest Toddler on the Block” has been revised since I first read it, and the new and improved edition is even more user-friendly. If you parent a special needs child or work with one, it is worth learning this compassionate and effective program.

does this look familiar? read on!

does this look familiar? read on!

Welcome to Your Child’s Brain: Book Review

Ever wonder if all the recommendations and “new” ways to raise your children are based on anything scientific? Well, “Welcome to Your Child’s Brain” will explain the current research behind popular recommendations such as eating fish during pregnancy and teaching your child another language while still in diapers.

Authors Sam Wang, PhD. and Sandra Aamodt, PhD. have written a book that is filled with useful information about brain development from the fetal stage all the way through the teenage years. Ever wonder what your 3-month old really sees? It’s in here. Why does your toddler son enjoy block play so much more than your neighbor’s toddler daughter? It’s in here. If you love science, you will love this book. if you just want to know how to get your toddler to eat spinach or whether watching baby videos will harm your child, you will love this book.

Issues like autism and ADHD are covered, as well as current research on language and math education. This book includes plenty of detail about regions of the brain understood to support all manner of thought, action and emotion. But just when you have had enough of the brain science, they give you a “Practical Tip” section that distills down the research into some information that you can really use today.

“Welcome to Your Child’s Brain” is worth the reading time. You will be amazed at what current neuroscience knows about your child!

Book Review: Bringing Up Bebe’

Pamela Druckerman had me when she described the French behavior management technique  “le gros jeux” or “the big eyes”.   I know plenty about those big eyes, but the stern glance I recall was coming from my Croatian-American father.   Although he was born here, he was raised in a strong European community and his approach to life was firmly rooted in the old country values.  That absolutely included how to discipline children. Getting “the look” from him was more than enough to know I was approaching the point where action would be taken, with or without a commentary in Croatian on how kids are different these days. Turns out, they do “the look” in France too.  It’s just called something, well, French.  

The author has written an amusing and readable book which follows her from pregnancy to becoming a mother of one daughter and twin sons.  She describes learning about the traditional French method of raising children from both new friends and experts in child development.  Her book might inspire families to consider an alternative to modern American approaches, but after a few chapters it will be evident that there is going to be something lost in translation. American parents may not have family and friends who support raising children using strategies that are not commonplace here.  In addition, French parents are fortunate to have extensive paid family leave, subsidized high-quality child care, and health care/education policies that make the French approach to raising children easier.

I encourage readers who are curious about how families in other cultures raise their children to pick up “Bringing Up Bebe'” with a croissant and a cafe’ au lait.  Enjoy!